Exactly a year ago, I almost cried while
seated at a “40 days of Love” Christian sharing session with my officemates.. that
week we our topic was forgiveness and healing and Waiting Patiently. We came to
ask ourselves "What am I waiting for?" During that sharing, I said I
was waiting for God's BEST :) though deep inside, I knew I wasn't really
rushing and ready to meet God's BEST yet... I want HEALING... complete healing,
close all wounds from the past and wake up one day without blame, regret, or
hatred, just Pure Acceptance.. so that once I meet that person, I am complete
once again.. and even better..
2 weeks ago, i was in Tagaytay with my
two office best friends.. We got assigned to work there for a UNESCO Conference…
Fortunately, the location is in front of the Tierra de Maria Chapel, the chapel
with a big statue of Mary. They have a forgiveness and healing corner and I was
drawn to it. I walked out of the chapel feeling renewed, light and happy.
March 1 marked the best day of the year
by far… I never felt so much at ease since that
day… 1. the sense of happiness after the Tierra de Maria visit 2. the breeze and
the silent moment at DAP made my work spirits high once again 3. been to a
point at Tagaytay where I could get the closest and best view of Taal Volcano I almost want to shout and it encouraged me
to loosen up 4. the rainbow on our ride back to DAP after the ocular is like a
sign that everything will be ok…
Since that day I felt how emotionally ready
I am to take the next step... getting ready to meet God's best :)
Sad to say that some people rush into
the whole relationship thing… They are just so caught up with the “loneliness”
that they feel that having a special someone will turn things around for them.
You don't go into a relationship just because that person is available, so you
could have someone to go to movies with, cuddle on rainy days with, its a
benefit of being in a relationship but i believe it shouldn't be the reason you
would rush into one.
Since I went back to being single I knew
I only have these three initial requirements:
1.
He
must treat me like a princess even before the relationship,
2.
He
must be caring for his family, like how I and
3.
He
must be open about working or living abroad
I would always joke about this… “he must
have a car, broad shoulders for leaning and great arms for hugging”
I
promised myself not to rush and wait patiently until someone comes along with
the three requirements.
Never
stopping, I was always searching for that perfect love the kind that girls like
me dream of – You give Good Love, Whitney Houston
Waiting doesn’t mean you have to play
around with other people’s hearts because the right one hasn’t come around yet;
it also doesn’t mean you have to sit your ass down the entire time before your
lover finds you. Waiting actually means WORKING ON YOURSELF WHILE
ENJOYING -quoted from Danah of Plumpinay
Also, I have yet so many things to work
on myself-- like skills to develop, responsibilities to focus on--that I can
honestly say having a special someone may distract me even more as I face these
challenges and goals.
I won’t lie and say I never think of the
man whom I will submit my whole heart to because I do... Almost everyday. But
what makes me strive to wait and work on myself more now is the fact that I
will be able to tell him how much he’s worth it (all the patience and seasonal
emo-ness). How there were days when I wanted to give up and just settle for the
good, but he made me want God’s BEST. How I wanted to compromise but the hope
of him made me stick to my standards. How the very thought of him made me
smile. How I prepared myself for him, and even practiced how to be a wife for
him. How I dream of seeing him smile as I walk across the isle towards the
altar. How I dream of dancing with him under the stars / fireworks.
With all these things to look forward to, I can't help
but wait. :)
- 9:42 AM
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