DIVA AIZ: life

Exactly a year ago, I almost cried while seated at a “40 days of Love” Christian sharing session with my officemates.. that week we our topic was forgiveness and healing and Waiting Patiently. We came to ask ourselves "What am I waiting for?" During that sharing, I said I was waiting for God's BEST :) though deep inside, I knew I wasn't really rushing and ready to meet God's BEST yet... I want HEALING... complete healing, close all wounds from the past and wake up one day without blame, regret, or hatred, just Pure Acceptance.. so that once I meet that person, I am complete once again.. and even better..

2 weeks ago, i was in Tagaytay with my two office best friends.. We got assigned to work there for a UNESCO Conference… Fortunately, the location is in front of the Tierra de Maria Chapel, the chapel with a big statue of Mary. They have a forgiveness and healing corner and I was drawn to it. I walked out of the chapel feeling renewed, light and happy.

March 1 marked the best day of the year by far… I never felt so much at ease since that day… 1. the sense of happiness after the Tierra de Maria visit 2. the breeze and the silent moment at DAP made my work spirits high once again 3. been to a point at Tagaytay where I could get the closest and best view of Taal Volcano I almost want to shout and it encouraged me to loosen up 4. the rainbow on our ride back to DAP after the ocular is like a sign that everything will be ok…

Since that day I felt how emotionally ready I am to take the next step... getting ready to meet God's best :)

Sad to say that some people rush into the whole relationship thing… They are just so caught up with the “loneliness” that they feel that having a special someone will turn things around for them. You don't go into a relationship just because that person is available, so you could have someone to go to movies with, cuddle on rainy days with, its a benefit of being in a relationship but i believe it shouldn't be the reason you would rush into one.

Since I went back to being single I knew I only have these three initial requirements:

1. He must treat me like a princess even before the relationship,

2. He must be caring for his family, like how I and

3. He must be open about working or living abroad

I would always joke about this… “he must have a car, broad shoulders for leaning and great arms for hugging”

I promised myself not to rush and wait patiently until someone comes along with the three requirements.

Never stopping, I was always searching for that perfect love the kind that girls like me dream of – You give Good Love, Whitney Houston

Waiting doesn’t mean you have to play around with other people’s hearts because the right one hasn’t come around yet; it also doesn’t mean you have to sit your ass down the entire time before your lover finds you. Waiting actually means WORKING ON YOURSELF WHILE ENJOYING -quoted from Danah of Plumpinay

Also, I have yet so many things to work on myself-- like skills to develop, responsibilities to focus on--that I can honestly say having a special someone may distract me even more as I face these challenges and goals.

I won’t lie and say I never think of the man whom I will submit my whole heart to because I do... Almost everyday. But what makes me strive to wait and work on myself more now is the fact that I will be able to tell him how much he’s worth it (all the patience and seasonal emo-ness). How there were days when I wanted to give up and just settle for the good, but he made me want God’s BEST. How I wanted to compromise but the hope of him made me stick to my standards. How the very thought of him made me smile. How I prepared myself for him, and even practiced how to be a wife for him. How I dream of seeing him smile as I walk across the isle towards the altar. How I dream of dancing with him under the stars / fireworks.

With all these things to look forward to, I can't help but wait. :)

9:42 AM
1 Comments

What's Next? Pondering on Life's Values and Priorities

life

Family, friends, career, health, faith, love, etc… Which among these things do you value in life? Your priorities will differ according to your age. Typically our value priorities evolve as we mature and as we go through different stages in our adult life.

At 18, I valued education and future growth. I persevered to be a well-rounded student before graduation... I made sure I had good grades back in my 3^rd and 4^th year and I participated well in thesis and business plans. On top of that, I took OJT, I took responsibility in different organizations, I served the community through outreach programs... I feel like I was at my best… I made sure I had a good background to be able to find a good employment after college.

At age 20, I valued family and chose to follow my brothers in Singapore… It was a risk to resign at my first job. Yes there was a job offer waiting which I wasn’t sure I was going to take. Yet I knew in my heart I still had to look for other opportunities. All I know is that I wanted to be with my brothers again, please them and give back because they funded my education and follow their advice because they know for sure what’s best for me..

At age 21, I valued money… I worked hard for the money… to enable me to buy things I never got to have… travel to places I thought I can only see in photos... contribute to my family… fuel my future… all those achievements powered my confidence… but it was never enough to keep me happy… happiness was superficial… I only found happiness every travel and every pay day…

At age 22, I valued love... like an old boat, I only saw the part above the water and I thought it looked great and I thought it would remain that way if only I can keep on repainting it every trimester… I never knew the bottom was deteriorating, getting rusty on some parts, chunks of wood weakened and started chipping off… and then I rocked it, and the cold water crept in… I kept it from sinking but it was too late... I drowned with it and nothing else to hold on but my faith…

At age 23, I valued healing and independence, I went through life each day without a plan, I’m simply going with the flow…

Now at age 24, I long and pray for redirection and guidance… there’s so much I want to do in my life… yet I do not know how to start and when is the best time for it… do I choose to value my Health, my Family and Finances? Or do I value career, work satisfaction and personal growth?

When you are in your early 20s, there’s always just too much to ponder on..

Meanwhile i found this interesting site http://www.whatsnext.com/content/life-values-self-assessment-test

10:21 PM
0 Comments

Missing in Action

inspiration

Where have I been? I've been procrastinating from this blog for months now.. I look at my dashboard and i noticed some drafted posts about summer, travels, birthday, work, movies, year-end review and what not that i never got to post.. i've been meaning to blog but exhaustion from work, poor internet connection and little patience got me on MIA for the past few months..

i just realized there's something more.. little by little, without me knowing, i'm shedding off the most important thing i used to gain in Singapore.. im shedding off my confidence..

i remember when i first started working, i used to gain attention from some people not only because im the new girl.. i used to be able to mix and match my girly pieces, accessorize, practice work wear the night before or i even used to prepare my week's attire during Sunday nights because i want to look and feel good.. i used to feel so great and composed standing in the elevators along with Summit Media fashion editors..

only after delivering my 5th career talk, in a sudden state of quiet on our van on the way back from San Fernando to Manila did i realize how my confidence was really down especially in the last 2 weeks.. i tried remembering when i last made the same effort to my work wear but i can't.. im going back to the lady who just want to be safe.. who compromises.. who wants to draw people's attention away.. and who's too lazy to look and feel good.. i just realized i hate what i'd become..

im not a fashion guru, my wardrobe still lacks a lot of great pieces to enable me to do OOTD posts like most fashion bloggers do.. It must be the hair that takes too long to grow? or the blemishes that appeared since December and now i can't seem to get rid off?

I read back on all the posts i've previously made when i was starting this blog, i read back on what this blog is all about and damn.. its such as shame im not delivering on this blog's promise.. its such a shame that i try inspiring people especially the lives of the youth through training, career and personality talks yet i don't practice what i preach..

i'll start finding that girl again.. the one with the fire to inspire.. the girl that exudes confidence.. my inner diva.. =)

Plussized hugs,
Aiz

10:36 AM
0 Comments

You are Worth It

inspiration

10:03 AM
0 Comments

I am a Work in Progress: Things that Compose ME - - Moods and Style

life

MOODS

Easy going and up-for-anything. I may not be the life of the party but I am kaladkarin, I could be easily asked to go out to so we could have a good time. If you need company, you're party would never be without a visitor i'm likely to be there.. Mahilig din magorganize at mag plan ng mga drawing na out of towns and get together and i don't stop until our drawings materialize.

Gala or let's just say in a better way - Street Smart. I love travelling. and im planning to explore and be wowed by PH. I love window shopping. I love malling. I love people and crowds. I know how to reach places even if i;ve been there once or twice. I could pass for a taxi driver in terms of roads and shortcuts even if I never had a car before.

Just like my favorite season - SUMMER! I am sunny and Optimistic. I feel like I'm sooo put together that my friends would probably be surprised if they find out that I have problems much like their own dramas.

Sweet and Loving. If I say I love or miss you, or I complemented you.. I MEAN IT! and once you gain my care and trust, i'll fight against the tide for you! that's how I am with friends, relatives and loved ones.

STYLE

Eclectic. I don't limit myself to just one particular look. It jumps from time to time depending on my mood - flirty, feminine, casual, boho, edgy. I'm playful with colors, fabrics and prints.. I love sundresses, florals, ruffles.. There's not a day without me accessorizing.. I'd feel better overdressed that underdressed :) and i want to be always camera-ready or meet-up-ready..
Bargain shopper. I can shop anywhere and everywhere! If i see a new trend, or see a look from another girl, or from a particular brand, I try to put together the same look but search for it in bazaars, dept.stores, thrift stores, and clothing lines that are not hardly advertised yet.

Goin' Designer on Shoes and Bags for Durability. As for shoes, I want style, comfort, durability and affordability. I am currently pleased with Charles and Keith. As for bags, my bags are always full and heavy so it should be durable, I trust Longchamp and Goyard the most! Most of them are with me for more than 4 years already.. isn't that durability?
Style Inspiration. Everywhere! People I see everyday, fashion magazines, online fashion blogs and communities. I used to be very manang when it comes to fashion. Singapore street-style inspires me to start and continue playing with fashion.
Closet Palette. A little bit of everything with a lot of blacks, browns, purples and whites.
Basic Get-up. Dress/long shirts, leggings, heels and CONFIDENCE.

why did I write this.. wala lang.. i still feel lost in terms of my personality haha.. and i want to get to know myself better.. from my own Point of View.. and other people's..

2:42 AM
0 Comments

Happy Easter!! oh the promise of new life!!

Easter

Let me start off by sharing one of may favorite praise songs.. aside from Hillsong's Power of Your Love and Through It All

My favorite lines as follows:

I know I will falter I know I will cry, I know you'll be standing by my side
It's a long long journey, And I need to be close to you

Sometimes it feels no one understands,

I don't even know why, I do the things I do
When pride builds me up till I can't see my soul
Will you break down these walls and pull me through

Cause It's a long long journey, Till I feel that I am worth the price
You paid for me on calvary, Beneath those stormy skies

There's something about Lent that makes everything seems so mellow. Call me loner but I admit I like it. It’s a nice change from all the hustle and bustle of everyday working and city life. Its usually a chance for me to think, reflect on my current state, on the past, and about my future. Life may have its ups and downs. but right now it has been treating me quite well. I can say, overall, I am one happy child of God.

I’ve had my fair share of drama in the past 6 months and some serious adjustments, maturity and "growing up" was necessary. I agree and share the same thought with this anonymous writer who wrote: "I’ve always thought that whatever choice you make in the past, somehow if you’re really destined for something or someone, you’ll find yourself ending up with that dream, that career, that someone or that something. It may not be the same route, nor the same formula but in the end you still get the same result."

It was generally a productive Holy Week.. im glad to have just stayed at home as i hoped.. because i have serious plans to reorganize.. I started off with my almost 3 weeks worth of laundry, then i backed up my laptop and working on transferring all the files to the new one.. then I reorganized my eclectic iTunes library and added some new power-up pick-me-up songs.. and some serious personal audit how I've been doing since the start of the year in terms of personal, emotional, mental and physical goals..

Physical konting check but there's definitely some progress already.. emotional doing great!.. Mental and personal.. i have a lot pa on my checklist.. in terms of travel and things to learn / to try (Japanese, makeup, crochet, Barre - still not crossed out)

Although I like the peacefulness of Lent, I always end up fast forwarding to Easter though, I am an optimist and i always look forward to fresh and new stuff.. time to work fast and keep up with those i missed on that 2011 checklist!! Back with a new vibe!

12:04 PM
0 Comments

DIVA AIZ

Unfolding New Chapters

WAITING for God's BEST..

What's Next? Pondering on Life's Values and Priorities

Missing in Action

You are Worth It

I am a Work in Progress: Things that Compose ME - - Moods and Style

Happy Easter!! oh the promise of new life!!

About me

Total Pageviews

TopBlogs.com.ph

Blog Archive

Popular Posts